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God Knows

September 3rd, 2017

I don't know about you but I grew up most of my life being told that God knows my life and will provide what I need when I need it. Which for me has been hard to believe because I've always felt in a sense I'm going through life alone. In the past few days since classes have started I have had some eye-opening moments from God about what he is truly doing in my life.

First, being that He has poured incredible people in my life at the right place at the right time. Kit Kat has known what to say no matter how harsh when I've needed it and Smiles has been an incredible shoulder for me when I've needed her lately. I never realized how truly blessed I am. Not only have these girls been here for me they have had just the words I have needed right when I needed them. Whether I was feeling down, stressed or betrayed in the past few days, God has provided people with words of encouragement to help me get through them.

Second, being that my struggle with self-harm, depression and suicidal thoughts is not just me. God has opened my eyes that people in other countries and other times have struggled with it. I saw it in Panama and was able to connect with the people there through my struggles and their struggles even though I don't speak the language. Just this morning as I was reading Philippians 1,  I realized that even Paul struggled with suicidal thoughts while he was in prison. Like what???? God showed me that I have never been alone in the things I am feeling in life which means neither are YOU.

Third, and I think most important I have learned that my worth is NOT dictated by someone else. My happiness is NOT dictated by someone else. They are found in GOD and He is SO good. Finding that thought is so incredibly freeing that it is almost impossible to describe. YOUR happiness is NOT dictated by someone else. YOUR worth is NOT dictated by someone else. How can that not set you free to be who God has truly called you to be?

God has been doing incredible things to open my eyes and my heart lately. God knows every step of the way. What in your life does God know?

xoxo,
Em

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