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Rule Ten

Yesterday, my dad sent me the beginning of the rules he lives his life by or life lesson he has learned along the way. I appreciated all of them but the last one stuck out to me in particular.

Rule Ten: Remember where you came from and who you are. 

As I have really pondered this idea since I started school, I came back to it yesterday. Who am I? Where do I come from? What do I want to represent in life?

These are questions that beg for answers far greater than I can suffice.

I spent all of high school wondering who I was but found my stride in college. Quite frankly since coming to professional school, I have started to wonder the same thing. How do I live like Jesus and love the people around me when it is the exact opposite of the culture? Don't we ask ourselves this all the time. Or maybe, it's just me.

As a Christian, I constantly ask myself how do I live as Christ in a world ran by the devil? I really don't have an answer. Shocker. I don't know everything. Let's be real, I don't know a lot of things. The meaning of my existence as a Christian is just the beginning. The Lord knew that I couldn't answer this. He brought me people to show me the answer.

I can't. I am not enough. God is. Let that soak in for a second. We live in a world of "I am enough" plastered on shirts, bumper stickers, or even tattoos but in reality we aren't. We are nothing without God. We can do no good without Him.

When we say that we can, that's pride my friends. We are letting ourselves equal God and that is no bueno.

I can be honest; I have been quite prideful in my life. I have done things or wanted to do things because it would make me look like the "good Christian." God smacked me upside the face. One step from, I think, smiting my existence. You want to talk about learning about where you came from. Learning humility. God knows how to teach it.

I have found two answers in my pursuit of who I am from God. The hopeless one: I am not enough and never will be because I chose wrong. Over and over again.

The real truth: He is enough. He is more than I could ever ask for. All I have to do is ask. Like dude, what?

I challenge you to really find who you are in Jesus. If you don't know, it sucks. Believe me, I've been there. The bottom of that barrel seems like an abyss. The further down we go, the harder it is to get out. Finding the top again, it hard. I admit that.

While I still am wrestling with how to love the people around me, I have found who I am. There are days when I still question. That's okay. It's okay to doubt. At the end of the day, know that God is still here. No matter how difficult admitting that might be.

My dad gave me rule ten and I don't fully know how to answer that. It made me think about who I am and how do I want to live my life for Jesus. Do I live my life for Jesus everyday? Most days, no. I don't choose Him but he STILL chooses me!

Real talk: I don't know who I am or what I am doing with my life. I know that I love Jesus. That's all I got. What about you?

Who are you? Where do you come from? How does this affect how you live your life?

xoxo,
Em


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