How a White Girl Does Life

I wonder how many times a day I ask God for something. How many times do I ask for him to do this specific thing so I can love Him more or be a "better" Christian? Most days I don't keep track but when I do, it's too many. I constantly ask for things. I feel like I treat God like a genie in a bottle. I pour in requests because I want this or that out of my life. Then I get upset because I don't get what I want from God. Then I will stop and think, I'm so selfish. Who am I to treat God as a genie? I need to reorder my priorities in life. Such as yesterday. I got so upset at some really small things with my lab or my third class for  school. All these small voices that I couldn't make it. I don't have what it takes to make it through school. I was put school before God. School was my idol. So I started asking God for all the things I needed for school. I put God in a box or a bottle to get what I thought I needed for school. Boy was I wrong. When

As I am sitting in Panera eating lunch, it dawns on me that I was having a whole conversation with myself this morning about a post I was going to write. Needless to say, I didn't actually remember until right now. Since I visited my alma mater (that's weird) this past week, I have had to do a lot of self-reflecting on where I am in this stage of my life. Most people, either friends from undergrad or pharmacy school are married, engaged or in committed relationships and I am sitting here single as a pringle. Let me tell ya it does not feel good. However, one of my friends, I'm not sure which told me that to find the relationship I desire that I need to have joy and contentment in this stage. That really got me thinking about where I am and who I perceive God to be in my life. So often, I find myself angry that I prayed for something and God didn't answer my prayer or do so in the timely fashion I had hoped. This causes me to put God in a genie bottle and say that I